Real...or Not Real

[P.C.]

Me too purelife.....pretty understanding.  But 'we're really tired' doesn't cut it for me.  I usually put a pretty goodly amount of fuss into it when I have people for dinner.  (I actually have friends that do this on a somewhat regular basis.)  I love them to pieces, but it drives me crazy.

  What can you do.  I guess I'm wondering if there is any totally cool way to say something when they do this.  Because I think it's really only a matter of different ways of how one is raised....I don't think it's something they give much thought to.  For the most part, I 'let it go'.  But I do find myself not really giving it my ALL the next time I invite them.  

[Sportsdude]

 that's pathetically sad purelife.
If that happened to me but in advance I'd give the tickets to an inner city youth program or something (if possible)
   

[purelife]

I would tell them how you really feel PC.  Tell your friends (who cancelled) that you put so much effort into this and them cancelling on you isn't a nice thing and it makes you feel like they're not valuing your time.  If they were your true friends, they'd try their best to understand your side of view.  I believe in being honest with your friends.  It's a great way in learning how much they can handle and if they are truly your friend.  There's friends and then there's friends.  

[purelife]

Oh, I was pissed (sorry for my choice of the harsh word).  Our committee initially only ordered 50 tickets but due to the high response, we ordered 50 more.  In the end, I had some unused tickets.  I sold some to scalpers there but the rest, couldn't do so in time.  I would've loved to give them away to a Children's place or something (like a hospital or school) if I had the time to.  But when I had these tickets on the day of the event, it was difficult.  I even resorted to asking people from this forum if they wanted to go.  I would have given them for free.  I still have some tickets in my wallet, unused.  People these days... aaarrggh!  

[purelife]

Oh, I've got another question.

How do you feel about people who constantly don't finish what they put on their plate?
 

[Sportsdude]

 Yeah maybe in the future you could have a 'last back out date'. That way you sort of force them to come (baring emergency) and if a lot do back out, a final date to do so would give you enough time to give the ticket events to a children's hospital or a boys and girls club (do they have those in Canada?).


   

[Sportsdude]

 purelife wrote:
Oh, I've got another question.

How do you feel about people who constantly don't finish what they put on their plate?

Oh boy, where to begin. Going to my Oma's house in Florida you have to eat everything on your plate or she'd give you a concentration camp story of her scraping mold off of bread. She gives you the "talk" as I put it. You don't want to get the little german lady angry nor hear the depressing story so you ate. I've sort of carried on that motto of be thankful for what you have.
 
 

[P.C.]

How frustrating purelife.  You could incorporate a cancellation policy.  It's 'only' $5 bucks for you to go, but $30 to cancel.  But you know....it's not all about the money.  It's about someone who has invested their heart and time into planning and organizing the event.  It's a big let-down.

  [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold"]How do you feel about people who constantly don't finish what they put on their plate?[/SPAN]
 

THAT'S and emotional issue for sure.  That one stems directly from how you are raised.  It's bordering on sinful (IMO) to take food and not eat it.  (because that's how I was raised)  I remember splurging on a Prime Rib Roast one night.  Our guest picked at it and then announced that she would just take the rest home for her dog.  (it was Prime rib perfection I tell ya)  Oy.  [TABLE bgColor=#ffffdd border=1] [TBODY] [TR] [TD align=middle colSpan=2][SMALL]Anti-Spam Bot-Stopper
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[Michel]

I even resorted to asking people from this forum if they wanted to go.

Oh sh** and I tought you were in love with me !  lol

Joking apart, sad situation PL. That was kind for asking.
 

[Michel]

I remember splurging on a Prime Rib Roast one night.  Our guest picked at it and then announced that [span style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: underline; font-style: italic;"]she would just take the rest home for her dog[/span].  (it was Prime rib perfection I tell ya)

*noise made by a cocking gun in the distance*
 

[P.C.]

OK....next social dilemma.

  How do you respond to someone whom you have invited to dinner, who says..."Oh...is it OK if we bring along Larry and Jenny?"

[Sportsdude]

first do I know this Larry or Jenny? Second if I don't, no way jose (esecially if I knew the kind of friends the person saying this hung around). If I knew Larry or Jenny then maybe. Depends what kind of gathering I was aiming for.  

[purelife]

If I had the space and enough food for them, then they could come.  Usually, I say no because I don't have the space nor did I prepare enough food.    

[P.C.]

Yea....I think it's a food prep/quantity issue too purelife.  On the other hand, I would never (could never) ask to invite my friends along with me on a dinner invite.  I think that a person could simply say....We'd love to be able to make dinner on Saturday night....unfortunately we have some people that will be coming by........  Putting in back in the hosts hands to say.....either ...."Well bring them along"....or...."Oh dear....bad luck for us.....maybe we can try again next weekend".