[BLOCKQUOTE type="cite"] [/BLOCKQUOTE] [BLOCKQUOTE type="cite"] [DIV dir=ltr][FONT color=black size=3 face="Times New Roman"][SPAN style="COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT size=3 face="Times New Roman"][/FONT]
[DIV dir=ltr] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: rgb(51,204,0); FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: rgb(0,0,0); FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: verdana, helvetica, sans-serif; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: verdana, helvetica, sans-serif; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: 'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: rgb(255,255,255); FONT-FAMILY: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; COLOR: rgb(0,0,0); FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV style="FONT-FAMILY: times, serif; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"] [DIV id=ecxyiv1183037130] [DIV class=ecxyiv1183037130Section1] [BLOCKQUOTE style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt"] [DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 12pt"]Henny Youngman was one of the Yiddish comedians who performed in the Catskills and did stand up comedy before the name of it was invented.[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT] [/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"]His most famous line was "Take my wife......please".[/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT] [/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"]My favorite was "I just came back from a pleasure trip; I drove my mother-in-law to the airport."[/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT] [/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"]Here's a few, most of which I hadn't heard before...[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT color=navy size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: navy; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV][/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=navy size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: navy; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT] [/DIV]
[DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"]My neighbor knocked on my door at 2:30 am this morning, can you believe that..... 2:30 A.M.? Luckily for him I was still up playing my bagpipes.
Man calls 911 and says "I think my wife is dead." The operator says how do you know? He says "The sex is the same but the laundry is building up!"
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling my leg."
I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice! At least I presume she was poor -- she only had $1.20 in her purse.
My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.
[/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV][FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT]
[FONT color=black size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: black; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"] [DIV style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: white; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial" class=ecxyiv1183037130MsoNormal]
Went for my routine check up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my ass! Do you think I should change dentists?
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." He says, "What do you expect? You're in a wheel chair."
I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening. "
The wife has been missing for a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So I have been to the thrift shop to get all her clothes back.[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT color=navy size=4 face=Arial][SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial; COLOR: navy; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt"][/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/BLOCKQUOTE][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][/BLOCKQUOTE]
