Funny Quotes

Lise · Nov 20 06 04:46

You mission, should you choose to accept, is to find some of the most funniest quotes you've heard and paste them here.

I'll start:

[FONT class=sqq]Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.[/FONT]

Robin Williams

Lise · Nov 20 06 04:48

Women need a reason to have sex, men just needs a place.

Billy Crystal

kitten · Nov 20 06 06:05

[FONT face=Verdana size=2]I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability. -Oscar Wilde[/FONT]

Russ · Nov 20 06 07:13

Any escape might help to smooth the unattractive truth, but the suburbs have no charms to soothe the restless dreams of youth. ~Rush

kitten · Nov 20 06 07:17

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. (Dave Barry)

[A href="vny!://www.workinghumor.com/quotes/dave_barry.shtml#"][/A]

Russ · Nov 20 06 07:23

I LOVE dave berry but I dont see him in the paper any more.. Is he still writing in different papers kitten? Are you finding any new material from him?

His style of dry writing is hilarious

kitten · Nov 20 06 07:25

I hadn't known he was in the paper before. There are quite a few of his books at the library, which is where I first came across his writing. He's so funny!

Russ · Nov 20 06 07:27

He used to write editorials for the sun and province about things that happened to his family and friends. I didnt realize he had books about.

kitten · Nov 20 06 07:34

Karate is a form of marital arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world. (Dave Barry)

[A href="vny!://www.workinghumor.com/quotes/dave_barry.shtml#"][/A]

Noam Chomsky · Nov 20 06 08:12

Colorless green ideas sleep furiously. (Noam Chomsky)[a href="vny!://www.workinghumor.com/quotes/dave_barry.shtml#"][/a]

P.C. · Nov 20 06 08:27

[img alt="" src="vny!://img.photobucket.com/albums/v217/echo9er/Blog%20Related%20Photos/Cartoons/Maxine/Maxine3.jpg"].

kitten · Nov 20 06 08:32

ROFL!!

[P align=left][FONT face=Verdana size=2]Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.[/FONT]

kingy · Nov 20 06 08:45

[SPAN class=body][FONT face=Verdana size=2]I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.[/FONT][/SPAN]

[SPAN class=body][FONT face=Verdana size=2][/FONT][/SPAN]

[SPAN class=body][FONT face=Verdana size=2]Steve Martin[/FONT][/SPAN]

kitten · Nov 20 06 08:49

.We are born with no food, clothes or money...then things get worse!

Lise · Nov 20 06 09:24

I thought 'Deep Throat' was a movie about a giraffe."

[SPAN class=toplinksm]Bob Hope[/SPAN]