This is a question that I guess has been driven in me my entire life. Some of you know the story some don't but here's the summary: Family got split up after world war 2, half stayed in hungary/germany while two brothers went to America. There's only 13 of us and the rest are in Europe. Anyway does your cultural heritage matter to you? It does to me because its something I've been able to hold on to in my life because I've had this need to connect to something.
Anybody feel this way?
Yes, it certainly does, I've spent hours tracing back my family tree and have found that one branch has had at least one person living in the same place since the 12th century. I've been back to look at it, it's a very small place with only about 200 people.
Nope.
lol purelife! my sister would say the samething.
I'm more interested in my past/future life that I have/will live(d). .
I think it's interesting, that's all.
My father has a framed family tree showing our line going back to Charlemagne.
He wanted me to be excited by that and I suppose I was amped about it as a teenager (when I was into dungeons and dragons). Now it really doesn't mean much to me. Don't get me wrong, I'm fascinated by history, but whether it's my family's history or the history of the Ainu in Hokkaido, I guess I feel about the same. I take neither pride nor shame from the actions of my forebears.
I'm more interested in the simple day to day existance of my family.....as in what life was like for them......what games did they play, what books did they read, how did they celebrate various occasions. This fascinates me more than their cultural place in history. Unless of course it was learned that they invented the wheel.
I agree with P.C.
I love looking at old photgraphs and even though my family went through tough times, (30s etc.), I am envious because the people of the world actually seem to care about the world. Not just buying a big screen and stopping their lives to watch Survivor. The modern world is pathetic!
lol invented the wheel. good one.
Well for me it was always grandpa would tell us a story or something. Its something I can't ignore really, I mean somebody wrote a news article/bio on my grandma. lol.
I mean I don't feel hungarian like the country, I just hate the fact that half of my family doesn't know I exist. Plus my name could die with me so I feel like I'm in the movie "The Last of the Mochians" with Daniel Day Lewis.
Basically I'm afraid of assimilation and when my grandma goes I'll be completely assimilated into society.
....and you think you are not a part of society because your grandmother is hungarian...and when she's gone, that it will change who you are?
I don't get it.
Racial and cultural heritage don't interest me at all. I actually get annoyed when people pester me about it with endless questions, or they keep yapping about their own (most often implying how "superior" they are).
I think nowadays those racial/cultural boundaries serve to separate us, rather than unite us.
However, I'm interested in personal family history (without patriotic, nationalistic connections) and have engaged in lengthy discussions with my Mom on who was who, and who did what.
Perhaps due to my academic background what interests me even more are the psychological patterns that were passed on from generation to generation.
That's where I see the potential for discovery and personal growth.
okay basically I'm saying when my grandma goes that link to the past is gone. Nobody in my family for example cooks the things she does, none of us speak german or hungarian.
I don't know what people do in Canada but here everyone trumps up their heritage. The irish folks always talk about what county in ireland they came from, the french still speak french at home. Then you've got the huge hispanic populations of mexicans, puetro ricans, cubans etc.
Basically I feel like Quebec feels about the french language. Its there last link to the past and they are afraid of losing it. Thats how I feel anyway.
okay basically I'm saying when my grandma goes that link to the past is gone. Nobody in my family for example cooks the things she does, none of us speak german or hungarian.
The link may be gone, but it doesn't change the history. If it matters to you, try learning to cook the things she does to pass down some history to the future little SD's. I don't know how learning the language of your ancestors connects you to your heritage. It just makes you know another language. I wouldn't feel any more connected to my grandmother if I learned to speak french. I feel MORE connected when I do things she used to do. When I'm in the garden, or enjoying nature is when I feel MOST connected, and it has nothing to do with cultural background and everything to do with WHO she was.
Basically I feel like Quebec feels about the french language. Its there last link to the past and they are afraid of losing it. Thats how I feel anyway.
There's nothing wrong with having respect for ones past, but clinging to it, unwilling to move forward because of it seems pointless to me.
Racial and cultural heritage don't interest me at all. I actually get annoyed when people pester me about it with endless questions, [FONT style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #ffff00"]or they keep yapping about their own (most often implying how "superior" they are[/FONT]).
I completely agree and couldn't word it better than you.
However, I'm interested in personal family history (without patriotic, nationalistic connections) and have engaged in lengthy discussions with my Mom on who was who, and who did what.
Thanks Raging Poodle......THAT'S what I was trying to say. You did a much better job. [img style="CURSOR: pointer" onclick=url(this.src); src="vny!://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/more/bigs/c014.gif" border=0]
I wonder what color Raging Poodle is.
okay there are other ways that connect me to my grandparents I have their outlook on life and so on. If I were to blame it on anything I just have to look at my uncles and my dad, they all married into big huge families. my hungarian side is very fractured. I ignore that part and just mainly focus on what my grandparents were about. So I do feel connected in that way, but that connection more has to do with politics and way of life. But if I look at it that way then yeah I'm pretty much a carbon copy of them.
I don't know anymore, I think this is just a family thing everyone goes through until they start their own family, but I've just always wondered.
But it really goes further then just oh I'd like to know my second cousins. I've lived my life expierencing other things. Like I've said before I've shopped in places and gone to places that the average thinking person wouldn't do. I've been to a mosque, a hindu temple, jewish synagogue, I've done all these things to experience something different.
Its more about culture then heritage I guess, those things fascinate me, drive me.
family history thats what I mean I just want to know who is alive and such. Just to say hey i'm so and so grandkid. Thats all I'm really looking for. If it sounded something different then oops. Family history thats what I strive for. My other side of the family can be traced back to the 1500's, I've got the book.
Its like a level in a video game. Its a locked level and I've got to find the key to open it or something.
Well if I were you SD....I think it might be of more value to you, to spend your energy just being SD. Allowing yourself to be shaped by what your past is, alters what your future could be.
well its not being shaped by my past. Although I'd like have my kids learn german (i'd learn with them to make it fun) because I heard kids and people who speak more then one language are smarter.
Well for me there are lots to learn from the past. I'm a family from peasants grandpa grew up a dirt floor. Grandma was in a concentration camp. So I'm anti facism, and I'm a big on labour and unions. My grandmother taught us that we should be thankful we aren't starving to death and had to scrap mold off of bread like she had to do in the russian gulags in order to survive. My grandpa for 7 years lived in a barn stable where he was a migrant for some rich count dude in austria. Meals every night consisted of soup in a giant kettle that 15 people ate out of at the same time.
Things like that won't ever leave me, they shaped me. So in that sense the past has helped me grow.
because I heard kids and people who speak more then one language are smarter.
I don't think that languages make someone more smart, but I do think that knowing and learning another language gives you an "upper-hand" in society. Also, depending on the language, it would also help understand English words. ie. Latin, Greek, etc. This makes the person a little more well-rounded, but I don't think any smarter than you or I.
My mom is in brain studies for things and they have said bi-lingual kids use both sides of there brains more or something like that.
tenkani wrote:
I wonder what color Raging Poodle is.
LOL. You can talk about that [A href="vny!://discoverseattle.net/forums/index.php/topic,4000.0.html"]here[/A].
Things like that won't ever leave me, they shaped me. So in that sense the past has helped me grow.
I think I disagree with that. It certainly shaped THEM and of course that will have a spin-off effect. It doesn't seem like it IS helping you grow (with all due respect). I think it's keeping you stuck in a world of misery that wasn't yours.
no its helped me a lot. I care about the poor, human rights, social justice and things like that. I would not have gotten those ideas if they were not passed down from my grandparents to my father to me.
Yup, why carry a burden of your heritage?
I dunno I've felt this 'burden' to prove something since I was little. Don't know why.
Maybe if you defined to yourself exactly what you're trying to prove (and why), you may have more success ?
I got confused with what I was trying to say and then Raging Poodle basically said what I was trying to say.
It's a mystery as to what we need from our pasts to allow us to grow and move on. It's different for everyone. If you feel that you need to know of these things in order to feel connected, there's nothing wrong with that.
You just have to make sure that you're not allowing yourself to stay stuck in their suffering. Take what you need to learn a lesson from them, and let the rest go. It'll cripple you if you carry it all with you. You won't be you......you'll be an extention of their woes.
thats what I'm worried about I feel unworthy to be living in such a high standing compared to what they came from. I don't want that part of me to take over but I'm afraid thats whats happening, that would explain the always taking the hard road approach I take in my life I guess.
thats what I'm worried about I feel unworthy to be living in such a high standing compared to what they came from. I don't want that part of me to take over but I'm afraid thats whats happening, that would explain the always taking the hard road approach I take in my life I guess.
I think you might be underestimating your grandparents. I can't believe for a moment that they would be happy that this is how you've interpreted their legacy. Instead of feeling unworthy.....take instead their strength to overcome difficulty. Instead of choosing to take the hard road, remember their hard road wasn't chosen.
That's what I was trying to say before. You are living in their shadow and I can only think they would be heartbroken to know you are trying. I would imagine they would feel greater pride to know you've taken the best examples of how they lived. Not that they had a dirt floor or even why they had a dirt floor....but that having a dirt floor didn't destroy them. Those are the things that they are to be admired for. Those are the strengths that you want to take from them. You believing that living on dirt floors too would in some way honour them isn't what they wanted you to learn from their life.
I'm proud of my heritage. Whatever heritage I have, I appreciate it for what it is. It's part of me, part of my children and I hope it will continue down the road for many years to come.
No I don't want to live on a dirt floor. Basically that has to do with this new house I live in. Its too big and its not me. I feel ashamed to live in it. Its not who I am, personally.
What I meant by the dirt floors is that I know where I came from and I don't take this for granted like I've seen my cousins do.
I've run out of thoughts.
lol same here
I have plenty of toughts, but they aren't in English :(
I have none. I'm exhausted.
I think I'll learn another language, so I can get some NEW thoughts. [img style="CURSOR: pointer" onclick=url(this.src); src="vny!://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/more/bigs/a065.gif" border=0]
lol como? por que?
You know, I just caught the tail end of an Oprah show. I have no idea what the subject was or who the people were that were on it......but this caught my attention. A woman said.....You use your 'stories' to keep you where you are. If you're ready to move forward, you have to be ready to let them go. It doesn't mean it didn't happen, it just means 'I'm' ready to allow this to simply become a part of my history. You're freeing yourself for what is to come.
It jumped out at me because it was so similar to what I was trying to say earlier, but she articulated it perfectly.
(Oh....they were talking about a book called The Secret.) Hmmmm must find out more.
ah, well those 'stories' don't hold me back just something today got me thinking.
I am who I am because of my forefathers and heritage. I dont forget it.. and I respect it. But I am my own person..
I do understand what you are trying to say SD, and respect your choices on that.. But you still have to live YOUR life as you see fit. Dont worry, itll come to you at some point. Just takes some time till you find your niche.
I've always wondered what my ultimate (traceable) ancestors talked about, what priorities they had, what was going on around them at the time, how they lived, what they ate, how they got on with their neighbours, iof they could ever afford holidays, what their basic (and I presume it was very basic - if at all) education was like - all sorts of mundane things; not least if they also wondered the same things about THEIR ancestors.
when I meant about taking my grandparents life and using it in today's world is basically I want to take up the mantle of fighting for the poor. But that really has nothing to do with my grandparents and more of what I've seen and been through in my 20 years so far. I've seen the other side, I've lived it. People are helpless out their and they need a voice.