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LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - It's a girl — again — for the Duggars. [SPAN id=lw_1186153011_0 style="CURSOR: hand; BORDER-BOTTOM: #0066cc 1px dashed"]Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar[/SPAN] welcomed their 17th child, and seventh daughter, into the world Thursday.

  Less than 30 minutes after giving birth, the Duggars already were talking of having more.

 

 [A href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070803/ap_on_fe_st/17_kids"]http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070803/ap_on_fe_st/17_kids[/A]

 [H1][FONT size=3]  

[/FONT][/H1] [H1]Chief Justice Roberts Suffers Seizure[/H1] [A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2007/07/30/national/w155050D08.DTL&tsp=1"]http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2007/07/30/national/w155050D08.DTL&tsp=1[/A]

[FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Something tells me this kid won't end up at the top of his class. [/FONT]



    [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Don't show it off if you can't wear it correctly. [/FONT]



      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Yeah, this is safe. [/FONT][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18pt"][/SPAN][/FONT]



      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Spray-painting the side of your house
Does not increase its perceived value. [/FONT][FONT face=Tahoma size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: maroon; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Ever heard of a leash? [/FONT][FONT face=Tahoma size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: maroon; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Great follow-up sign. [/FONT][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18pt"][/SPAN][/FONT]



    [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]Maybe this was her favorite skirt.  Or, maybe she's [/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=6][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 24pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Crying[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Verdana color=maroon size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: maroon; FONT-FAMILY: Verdana"] tears of relief that she wore panties today[/SPAN][/FONT]



      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]The smiley face is a nice touch[/FONT]



      [FONT face=Verdana color=#800000]There are just some things you can' t un-see [/FONT][FONT face=Tahoma size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: maroon; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

YOUR AGE BY EATING OUT

This is pretty neat.

DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN
FIRST!

It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read ...

Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!


1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat.

    (more than once but less than 10)


2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)



3. Add 5



4. Multiply it by 50


5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1757...
    If you haven't, add 1756.


6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.



You should have a three digit number.



The first digit of this was your original number. ( i.e., How many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.)



The next two numbers are



YOUR AGE ! ------ (Oh YES, it is!!!)



THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2007) IT WILL EVER WORK

This is a quiz for people who know everything!  These are not trick questions.
They are straight questions with straight answers.


 

1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.

2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?

3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?

4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?

5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine;  it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters " dw" and they are all common words.  Name two of them.

7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?

8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.

9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter "S."

 

   [DIV id=printheader][img class=brandlogo alt=SFGate src="http://sfgate.com/templates/types/article/graphics/sfgate_printable.gif"]

[H1]IT'S JUSTIN, LIVE! ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT![/H1] [H2]S.F. startup puts camera on founder's head for real-time feed, and a star is born[/H2] [P class=byline]Jessica Guynn, Chronicle Staff Writer

 [P class=date]Friday, March 30, 2007

 [DIV class=sidebar] [DIV id=objecthumbs] [DIV id=contentobjects][A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL&o=0&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Justin Kan, up close, is available online 24/7 in real ti..." src="http://sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/03/30_t/bu_justintv327kk_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A] [A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL&o=1&type=printable" target=""][img alt="9:15 a.m.: Lights, camera, Internet. Justin Kan wakes. On..." src="http://sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/03/30_t/ba_justintv_001lh_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A] [A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL&o=2&type=printable" target=""][img alt="10:57 a.m.: Two-fisted talking. Kan takes a call while he..." src="http://sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/03/30_t/ba_justintv_091lh_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A] [A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL&o=3&type=printable" target=""][img alt="2:34 p.m.: Lisa Peterson (left), Angel Schneider, Kan and..." src="http://sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/03/30_t/ba_justintv9lh_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A] [A class=more href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL&o=4&type=printable" target=""]More...[/A]

[DIV class=clear][/DIV][/DIV][/DIV][SPAN id=articlebody] Just call him Air Justin.  Eleven days ago, 23-year-old Justin Kan was just another no-name startup guy with big dreams of the small screen. Then he and his friends launched [A href="http://www.justin.tv/"]Justin.tv[/A], an Internet reality show chronicling their adventures as young San Francisco entrepreneurs that, at least for now, is proving to be a smash hit with online viewers.  Kan calls it "lifecasting." The concept is simple: Using technology his team developed, Kan has strapped a camera to his head to capture every moment of his existence in live streaming video on the Internet. Viewers literally see the world through Kan's virtual eyes, which broadcast his life onto the Web 24/7. He interacts with his audience through 21 chat rooms and hundreds of e-mails each day. He even took their calls on his cell phone until he got overwhelmed.  The show's slogan says it all: "Waste time watching other people waste time." And that's what tens of thousand of folks around the globe are doing, turning Kan into an online phenom by tuning in to his irreverent and uncensored world. That sudden explosion of peeping onlookers has caused so many technical difficulties that Justin.tv had to recruit volunteers from the audience to keep the show rolling.  Viewers seem to delight in playing along with their new online idol, cramming chat rooms and pulling pranks on him, first calling 911 to report a stabbing in the group's apartment (prompting some friends to give Kan a bullet-proof vest for the next time officers burst in, guns drawn), then reporting a fire there. San Francisco emergency dispatchers, leery of any more false alarms, now call to confirm there's an actual emergency before responding. So fans moved on to different sorts of pranks, such as ordering $63 worth of pizza to be delivered to Justin.tv's door.  Instant fame has had some pretty dramatic results. Kan's inbox overflows with praise ("please go off the air, you're ruining my life with your addictive site") and questions particularly of the personal nature, such as what will he do when he masturbates or has sex on-screen.  Meanwhile, Emmett Shear, 23, and Kyle Vogt, 21, who comprise the technical team, have barely slept in a desperate effort to keep up with the ever-increasing traffic. Michael Seibel, the show's 24-year-old producer, appears to have a cell phone permanently attached to his ear.  Kan jokes that he should hire a full-time assistant just to accept all the new friend requests on MySpace and Facebook. He's already getting noticed on the street. And he is getting flattering attention -- and even his first onscreen kiss -- from his most coveted demographic: starstruck young hotties. (He has lined up three blind dates this weekend). Coming in a close second: Fans who treat him and his cash-strapped gang to dinner. Those fan get an on-air shout-out.  "Eventually my ego is going to be the size of the planet Earth," Kan said.  The business model centers on product placement. Already corporate sponsors are lining up to plug their products alongside Zipcar rentals and Bawls energy drink, both of which have posters on the walls of Justin.tv's headquarters in North Beach. The apartment is four blocks from where the movie "Ed TV," in which a video clerk agrees to have his life videotaped for network TV, was filmed. And Hollywood producers, charged with figuring out new strategies for delivering shows to viewers, are looking to get a piece of the action even though the production values are as crude as the Justin.tv vocabulary.  Of course, Justin.tv is a new twist on an old idea, piggybacking on earlier hits such as MTV's "Real World" and Jennicam, an Internet site run by a young woman who in 1996 became one of the first to install webcams in her home so viewers could observe every aspect of her private life. Kan hopes his show's budding success will power a Justin.tv network complete with a lineup of shows, including a "Sex and the City"-inspired tale to be filmed in Manhattan.  "We want to find people far more charismatic and attractive than me to go out and do this," Kan said.  All the runaway hype begs the question: Will Justin.tv be fad or flop?  Andrew Keen, a sharp critic of the self-broadcasting movement whose book "The Cult of the Amateur" comes out in June, says this brand of digital narcissism not only will fail, it will be recalled with shame in more sober economic times, just like the dot-coms of the late 1990s.  "This is the last gasp of the Web 2.0 boom," Keen said. "People are going to look back at this and say, 'This makes Second Life look like the BBC.' I think even Justin will look back on it and be embarrassed.  "This (show) attracts people who are profoundly bored with their lives and are waiting for the next media fix. They will go on to the next thing when they get bored of this thing. It has no legs."  Months ago, when The Chronicle first met the Justin.tv crew as they were in the early planning phase, the show certainly seemed like a gamble. Would people with lives of their own sit around and watch Kan live his, even when he's just spending face time with his laptop or going to the bathroom with the camera discreetly pointed toward the ceiling?  Justin.tv is more than ready for prime time, insists Paul Graham, founder of Y Combinator, which provided seed money for the company. The business incubator usually gives the companies it sponsors about $5,000 per founder.  "Of the 39 startups we've funded so far, Justin.TV might have the most potential," Graham said. "Ultimately their plan is to have hundreds of people with these cameras. Each would be a channel; viewers would watch whichever was most interesting at that time. With hundreds of people, there would always be something interesting. So why would anyone even switch on their TV?  "If this doesn't scare the s -- out of TV networks, it's only because they don't understand it yet. TV is moving to the Internet especially for the 18- to 35-(year-old) males the TV networks can barely hang onto now."  Kan's concept is another step in rewriting the script for programming, said John Furrier, CEO of Podtech.net, a Silicon Valley podcasting network. "It's not about what it is today but what it will turn into. A lot of people will be quick to dismiss the quality of his programming. And it will be crude at first. But it will evolve very quickly."  To get an idea of what Justin.tv is all about right now, picture four guys gone wild in a two-bedroom apartment littered with disheveled furniture, empty beer cans, remnants of pizza crust and randomly strewn socks and shoes. On a giant white board is the show's apparent goal: Jay Leno, 30 days or less. On another smaller white board is a long list of possible activities for Kan, from going to a shooting range to making a deposit at a sperm bank.  Advertisers' banners adorn the walls. Even Hearst Castle is an unofficial sponsor. The Justin.tv crew, frustrated that the castle was closed during a recent road trip, "borrowed" one of its flags. Kan is fixated on getting Budweiser as a sponsor, which would help with the drain on the thirsty startup's budget.  Kan, who says he grew up a shy introvert in an upper-middle-class family in Seattle, has a bona fide exhibitionist streak. A Yale physics and philosophy grad turned high-tech entrepreneur, he once posed lathered in shaving cream for a college pin-up calendar to raise money for tsunami relief, and he sold his first Internet company in an attention-getting stunt on eBay.  Now his average day alternates between a blur of antics and long spells of boredom. Kan never takes the camera off unless he's sleeping. That's the only time the camera actually films him instead of his perspective on the world. Viewers, tired of waiting for him to rise, like to egg his roommates on to wake him. On a recent morning, they poured a glass of water on him.  Kan likes to think and talk about himself as a man of the people, so he gets out in the world when he can. Highlights from earlier this week: a walk to pick up coffee -- Kan started drinking it a month ago to get more pep earlier in the day -- a flurry of media interviews and lunch in South Park with his No. 1 fan, friend Seeyuen Lee. Lee began watching Justin.tv before it launched. "Now that they have thousands of viewers, everyone wants to be Justin's No. 1 fan, but I am squatting on the title," she said.  Later, Kan headed for the Museum of Modern Art to meet with the folks at Podtech, then to take his friend and neighbor, Steve Huffman, who became a millionaire by selling his startup Reddit to Wired Digital, shopping for a Corvette at Ellis Brooks Chevrolet.  No errand is ordinary when you have a camera strapped to your head. Kan, who ran out of clean socks, walked to Fisherman's Wharf to buy some more at the Gap but was kicked out when he refused to stop shooting. Soon he got an e-mail from a viewer: "Hey Justin I gave a call to that Gap store hah. I told the guy you had 1,000 people watching the camera live and he just looked like a dick to the whole Internet."  Rather than return empty-handed to the apartment, Kan wandered across the street to watch breakdancers as the sun set on the bay. As he took in the booming music and acrobatic moves, he became still for the first time all day, and, for a moment, appeared alone in the crowd. "It's nice to watch someone else perform instead of me," he said.  Kan realizes there are downsides to so much notoriety. He and Seibel have to instant message each other with phone numbers and other sensitive information they don't want to go out on the air. And, despite all the attention, Kan has never before been so isolated. He spends far more time interacting with strangers than his own family.  With a show that runs more on impulse than inspiration, Kan has considered banning his parents' IP addresses from accessing the site. He doesn't want them to see him acting "like an ass," he says.  Then the moment passes, and he's off again, drawn to the glow of an evening spent with friends over pizza and poker. When some of Vogt's friends from MIT show up, they can't believe the show is for real. So Kan tells viewers that if they send 100 e-mails in 20 minutes, the entire gang will dive into the swimming pool completely clothed. Kan clocks 300 messages.  With that kind of response, Kan says he has no intention of turning off the camera anytime soon.  "We will keep going as long as it's fun and as long as it's relevant," he said. "I figure that will be for a long time to come. ... If I wasn't starting this company, I would be starting another company. It's my job. It's my life."  E-mail Jessica Guynn at [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A]. [/SPAN] [P id=url]http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/03/30/MNG8OOUQI81.DTL

[A href="http://video.tinypic.com/player.php?v=2ntjwpc"]Family Jewels[/A]

can a man do this?

[A href="http://video.tinypic.com/player.php?v=4bp6ali"]cheek muscles[/A]  

[A - 1]

 [H1]Going to Canada? Check your past[/H1] [H2]Visitors with minor criminal records turned back at border[/H2] [P class=byline][A href="mailto:[email protected]"]C.W. NEVIUS[/A]

 [P class=date]Friday, February 23, 2007

[SPAN id=articlebody] There was a time not long ago when a trip across the border from the United States to Canada was accomplished with a wink and a wave of a driver's license. Those days are over.  Take the case of 55-year-old Lake Tahoe resident Greg Felsch. Stopped at the border in Vancouver this month at the start of a planned five-day ski trip, he was sent back to the United States because of a DUI conviction seven years ago. Not that he had any idea what was going on when he was told at customs: "Your next stop is immigration.''  Felsch was ushered into a room. "There must have been 75 people in line," he says. "We were there for three hours. One woman was in tears. A guy was sent back for having a medical marijuana card. I felt like a felon with an ankle bracelet.''  Or ask the well-to-do East Bay couple who flew to British Columbia this month for an eight-day ski vacation at the famed Whistler Chateau, where rooms run to $500 a night. They'd made the trip many times, but were surprised at the border to be told that the husband would have to report to "secondary'' immigration.  There, in a room he estimates was filled with 60 other concerned travelers, he was told he was "a person who was inadmissible to Canada.'' The problem? A conviction for marijuana possession.  In 1975.  Welcome to the new world of border security. Unsuspecting Americans are turning up at the Canadian border expecting clear sailing, only to find that their past -- sometimes their distant past -- is suddenly an issue.  While Canada officially has barred travelers convicted of criminal offenses for years, attorneys say post-9/11 information-gathering, combined with a sweeping agreement between Canada and the United States to share data, has resulted in a spike in phone calls from concerned travelers.  They are shocked to hear that the sins of their youth might keep them out of Canada. But what they don't know is that this is just the beginning. Soon other nations will be able to look into your past when you want to travel there.  "It's completely ridiculous,'' said Chris Cannon, an attorney representing the East Bay couple, who asked that their names not be used because they don't want their kids to know about the pot rap. "It's a disaster. I mean, who didn't smoke pot in the '70s?''  We're about to find out. And don't think you are in the clear if you never inhaled. Ever get nabbed for a DUI? How about shoplifting? Turn around. You aren't getting in.  "From the time that you turn 18, everything is in the system,'' says Lucy Perillo, whose Canada Border Crossing Service in Winnipeg, Manitoba, helps Americans get into the country.  Canadian attorney David Lesperance, an expert on customs and immigration, says he had a client who was involved in a fraternity prank 20 years ago. He was on a scavenger hunt, and the assignment was to steal something from a Piggly Wiggly supermarket. He got caught, paid a small fine and was ordered to sweep the police station parking lot.  He thought it was all forgotten. And it was, until he tried to cross the border.  The official word from the Canadian Border Services Agency is that this is nothing more than business as usual. Spokesman Derek Mellon gets a little huffy when asked why the border has become so strict.  "I think it is important to understand that you are entering another country,'' Mellon says. "You are not crossing the street.''  OK, but something changed here, didn't it?  "People say, 'I've been going to Canada for 20 years and never had a problem,' '' Lesperance says. "It's classic. I say, 'Well, you've been getting away with it for 20 years.' ''  A prior record has always made it difficult to cross the border. What you probably didn't know was that, as the Canadian Consulate's Web site says, "Driving while under the influence of alcohol is regarded as an extremely serious offense in Canada.''  So it isn't as if rules have stiffened. But what has changed is the way the information is gathered. In the wake of 9/11, Canada and the United States formed a partnership that has dramatically increased what Lesperance calls "the data mining'' system at the border.  The Smart Border Action Plan, as it is known, combines Canadian intelligence with extensive U.S. Homeland Security information. The partnership began in 2002, but it wasn't until recently that the system was refined.  "They can call up anything that your state trooper in Iowa can,'' Lesperance says. "As Canadians and Americans have begun cooperating, all those indiscretions from the '60s are going to come back and haunt us.''  Now, there's a scary thought. But the irony of the East Bay couple's situation is inescapable. Since their rowdy days in the '70s, they have created and sold a publishing company, purchased extensive real estate holdings and own a $3 million getaway home in Lake Tahoe.  "We've done pretty well since those days,'' she says. "But what I wonder is how many other people might be affected.''  The Canadian Border Services Agency says its statistics don't show an increase in the number of travelers turned back. But Cannon says that's because the "data mining'' has just begun to pick up momentum.  "It is too new to say,'' he says. "Put it this way. I am one lawyer in San Francisco, and I've had four of these cases in the last two years, two since January. And remember, a lot of people don't want to talk about it (because of embarrassment).''  Asked if there were more cases, attorney Lesperance was emphatic.  "Oh, yeah,'' he says. "Just the number of calls I get has gone up. If we factor in the greater ability to discover these cases, it is just mathematically logical that we are going to see more.''  The lesson, the attorneys say, is that if you must travel to Canada, you should apply for "a Minister's Approval of Rehabilitation" to wipe the record clear.  Oh, and by the way, if you don't need to travel to Canada, don't think you won't need to clear your record. Lesperance says it is just a matter of time before agreements are signed with governments in destinations like Japan, Indonesia and Europe.  "This,'' Lesperance says, "is just the edge of the wedge.''  Who would have thought a single, crazy night in college would follow you around the world?
  Rules for getting  into Canada  For more information on offenses that prohibit entry to Canada, go to the Canadian Consulate's Web site at [A href="http://geo.international.gc.ca/can-am/seattle/visas/inadmissible-en.asp"]geo.international.gc.ca/can-am/seattle/visas/inadmissible-en.asp[/A].  For more information on visiting Canada, go to [A href="http://cic.gc.ca/"]cic.gc.ca[/A]. [/SPAN] [P id=url]http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/02/23/NEVIUS.TMP

 [P id=pageno]This article appeared on page A - 1 of the San Francisco Chronicle

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[(02-12) 12:59 PST SAN FRANCISCO]

 [H1]Unprecedented SF study find pot helps ease pain[/H1] [P class=byline][A href="mailto:[email protected]"]Sabin Russell, Chronicle Medical Writer[/A]

 [P class=date]Monday, February 12, 2007

[SPAN id=articlebody] (02-12) 12:59 PST SAN FRANCISCO -- Doctors at San Francisco General Hospital reported today that HIV-infected patients suffering from a painful nerve condition in their hands or feet obtained substantial relief by smoking small amounts of marijuana in a carefully constructed study funded by the State of California.  Although the study itself was small, it is the first of its kind to measure the therapeutic effects of marijuana smoking while meeting the most rigorous requirements for scientific proof -- a so-called randomized, double-blinded placebo-controlled trial.  As such, the results of the trial are being hailed by medical marijuana advocates as the most solid proof to date that smoking the herb can be beneficial to patients who might otherwise require opiates or other powerful painkillers to cope with a condition known as peripheral neuropathy.  Federal agencies oppose the use of marijuana for medical purposes on the grounds that it is harmful and that there is no scientific evidence to support medical use of marijuana for treatment in the United States.  "It's time to wake up and smell the data,'' said Bruce Mirkin, spokesman for the Marijuana Policy Project, a group advocating legalization of medicinal use of the drug. "The claim that the government keeps making that marijuana is not a safe or effective medicine doesn't have a leg to stand on.''  The study found that most volunteers who were given three marijuana cigarettes a day experienced a significant drop in the searing pain of peripheral neuropathy, which patients liken to a stabbing or burning sensation, usually on the bottoms of their feet.  On average, the participants in the experiment reported at the start that their pain was roughly at midpoint on a 100 point scale, where zero was no pain at all and 100 was "the worst pain imaginable.''  At least half the volunteers who smoked the active marijuana experienced a 72 percent reduction in pain after smoking their first cigarette on the first day of the trial. Over the course of five days, the median reduction in pain reported by the marijuana smokers was 34 percent, compared to 17 percent reported by those who smoked placebo cigarettes that had the active ingredient THC removed in a process akin to decaffeinating coffee.  "This is evidence, using the gold standard for clinical research, that cannabis has some medicinal benefits for a condition that can be severely debilitating,'' said Dr. Donald Abrams, lead author of the study released today by the journal Neurology.  The trial was conducted over a two-year period during which 50 volunteers each spent a week at a secured laboratory at San Francisco General. After a two-day orientation period, during which they stopped smoking marijuana they may have been using, they were given one cigarette three times a day. Half of the volunteers received marijuana containing about 3.5 percent of THC, the active ingredient of the drug; the other half received the placebo.  Abrams said that the placebo cigarettes looked and smelled identical to the ones containing active ingredients  Because of the unusual nature of the experiment, Abrams first had to receive clearance from eight different government agencies, including the University of California, the federal Drug Enforcement Administration, and the National Institute on Drug Abuse.  The cigarettes were made from marijuana grown on a federal marijuana farm in Mississippi, and stored in a locked freezer at San Francisco General.  E-mail Sabin Russell at [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A]. [/SPAN] [P id=url]http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/02/12/BAG6KO3BLP5.DTL

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[A stupid radio stunt's tragic finale Sacramento DJs joked as contestant guzzled fatal quantity of water]

[A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL"]A stupid radio stunt's tragic finale
Sacramento DJs joked as contestant guzzled fatal quantity of water[/A] [FONT size=2][/FONT]
[FONT face=geneva,arial size=1]- [A href="mailto:[email protected]"]C.W. Nevius[/A]
[/FONT][FONT face=geneva,arial size=-2]Thursday, January 18, 2007
[/FONT] [A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL&o=0&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/01/18_t/ba_water_intoxicatio_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL&o=1&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/01/18_t/ba_nevius17_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL&o=2&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/01/18_t/ba_all_fraternity_death_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A]  There were lots of reasons to think Jennifer Strange was in deep trouble after she spent hours guzzling in a water-drinking contest at a Sacramento radio station.  "I asked her, 'How do you feel?' " said Elidia Campos, one of 20 contestants. "She said, 'Oh, my God. I feel so awful, I'm about to pass out.' ''  But the DJs at KDND-FM apparently figured that was her problem, wasn't it? It was her choice to enter Friday morning's contest. The hosts can be heard joking on an [A href="http://www.sacbee.com/static/newsroom/kdndslides/" target='_BLANK"']audiotape[/A] of Friday's show about how Strange's stomach was distended from drinking nearly 2 gallons of water, and they teased her and other contestants because they did not "look so good."  Told by another DJ that "We got a guy who's just about to die," one of the jocks had a quick response.  "Make sure he signs the release," he chortled, setting off gales of laughter in the studio.  It was, in short, typical dumbbell morning radio, featuring the kind of stupid stunts and heckling that have raised ratings on stations across the nation. It has certainly worked for KDND's "The Morning Rave," which has become one of Sacramento's top-rated drive-time shows. And if you found their antics mean and offensive, maybe you just weren't cool enough to get the joke.  Then Jennifer Strange died.  Twenty-eight years old, married and the mother of three, Strange had entered the "Hold your Wee for a Wii'' contest to try to win a Nintendo Wii video game player for her kids. Contestants had to drink as much water as they could without going to the bathroom. What Strange didn't know was that after drinking so much water in a little over four hours, she'd given herself a deadly condition that the coroner would later say was consistent with water intoxication. She was found dead that afternoon in her Rancho Cordova home.  Strange was one of the original 20 contestants who were put in a room with one DJ separate from the studio where they could not hear on-air comments or callers. Once the contest was narrowed down to two, Strange and the eventual winner, Lucy Davidson, were brought into the studio.  None of the contestants had any idea what they had gotten themselves into.  "I thought it was just water," Campos says, "that it would just flush out my body. I just assumed that because it was a contest, everything would be checked out."  Hardly. As the contestants dropped out, it became clear that some of them were having serious health problems. Not that anyone at the station seemed concerned.  "There was a girl on the floor," says Campos, who made it to the final five. "She must have been there for an hour with her teeth chattering. They were heckling her."  "Your body is 98 percent water," one of the hosts remarked to his on-air audience. "Why can't you take in as much water as you want?"  Because, as many of us in the Bay Area learned two years ago, an excess of water creates a physical shutdown. Pleasant Hill college student Matt Carrington died in 2005 of water intoxication in a hazing incident at a Cal State Chico fraternity.  In fact, Carrington's case came up on Friday. Someone in the studio mentioned "that poor kid in college," but another DJ responded that Carrington "was doing other things."  No, actually, he wasn't. As a listener who identified herself as "Eve" told the morning crew, people "can get sick and possibly die from water intoxication."  "We're aware of that," one jock replied. And another jumped in to wisecrack that everyone in the contest had signed releases, "so we're not responsible."  Another joke. Are those guys zany and irreverent or what?  Well, here's another good one. Sacramento sheriff's spokesman Sgt. Tim Curran said Wednesday that the department feels that it has enough information to begin an investigation. Originally, the sheriff had said that because the contestants entered under their own free will, there might have been no crime.  But that changed after investigators heard a tape this week of the on-air conversations and how the hosts disregarded the caller's warnings and signs that Strange and other contestants were experiencing symptoms of intoxication. Sacramento district attorney's office spokeswoman Lana Wyant said prosecutors will be watching the results of the investigation as they consider filing charges.  Station Vice President and General Manager John Geary issued a statement of sympathy on Tuesday. The same day, the station announced that it had fired 10 staff members, including the five hosts of the "Morning Rave," which was canceled.  Meanwhile, the lawsuits are likely to stretch from here to the top of the Sierra. A legal action is already in the works from an attorney representing the Strange family. Because as tragic as Strange's death was, other contestants on Friday were nearly as ill.  "No one was more sick than anyone else," Campos says. "We were so out of it, so disoriented. I felt like I was drunk. There was no way I could make a rational decision, especially with people egging you on."  Campos dropped out with two other contestants when one of them began to vomit. That triggered two others to throw up, although it didn't help when one of the DJs made retching sounds to encourage heaving.  "I had cold sweats, my head hurt, and I can't even guess how many times I threw up on the way home," Campos says. "I passed out in bed at 11 (a.m.) and didn't wake up until my husband shook me awake at 6 that night."  Campos wonders if she somehow could have intervened when Strange became very ill. They talked about their kids, watched a video on Campos' DVD player, and commiserated about how terrible they felt.  "We totally had a moment together," says Campos, 33. "She talked about her kids the whole time. I just can't stop thinking about it."  Meanwhile, Lukas, Maney and Trish, hosts of "The Morning Rave," released a statement.  "At this time," it said, "we would like to express our deepest condolences to the family of Jennifer Strange. We want to thank all of our listeners for their continued support and we ask that you join us by keeping Jennifer and her family in your thoughts and prayers."  Now they're sorry? What a joke.
  Drinking too much water can be fatal  Water intoxication: When a person drinks large quantities of water rapidly, the normal balance of electrolytes in the body can be diluted to the point that brain function is disturbed, leading to light-headedness, nausea, vomiting, headaches and sometimes death.  Who's at risk: Anyone who drinks too much water too fast can be affected, but infants, marathon runners and people working in extreme heat are particularly vulnerable. Drinking fluids made to replace electrolytes can help prevent intoxication.
  Another recent case  Cal State Chico student Matthew Carrington, 21, of Pleasant Hill, collapsed and died of heart failure after members of a fraternity forced him to drink excessive amounts of water while he performed calisthenics during a hazing ritual on Feb. 2, 2005. Four members of the Chi Tau fraternity pleaded guilty to involuntary manslaughter.  Audio link  To listen to conversations between the DJs and Jennifer Strange,  go [A href="http://www.sacbee.com/static/newsroom/kdndslides/" target='_BLANK"']here.[/A]  C.W. Nevius' column appears regularly. His blog, C.W. Nevius.blog, and podcast, "News Wrap," can be found at sfgate.com. E-mail him at [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A].  Page A - 1
[FONT size=3]URL: http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL [/FONT] [HR align=left SIZE=1] [!-- Standard Article Footer --][FONT size=1][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/chronicle/info/copyright/"]©2007 San Francisco Chronicle[/A] [/FONT][!--End Article Footer--][A name=sections][/A][!--END CHRONICLE SECTIONS PULLDOWN--] [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script]  [!--  function setCookie(NameOfCookie, value, expirehours) (  var ExpireDate = new Date ();  ExpireDate.setTime(ExpireDate.getTime() + (expirehours * 3600 * 1000));  document.cookie = NameOfCookie + "=" + escape(value) +  ((expirehours == null) ? "" : "; expires=" + ExpireDate.toGMTString()) +  "; path=/;" ;  )  if (document.cookie.indexOf('Orbitz')==-1)  (  setCookie('Orbitz','yes',18); var bnum=new Number(Math.floor(99999999 * Math.random())+1);  TheNewWin =window.DOH!("/templates/types/popunder/orbitz/orbitz.html",'TheNewpop','width=720,height=300,toolbar=0,location=0,directories=0,status=0,menubar=0,scrollbars=0,resizable=0');   TheNewWin.blur();  ) // --]  [/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_addPair("site","sfgate")[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_addPair("section","news||")[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_addPair("psection","article|news|")[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_addPair("usertype","reader")[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_addPair("pagetype","article")[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_js=1.0[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script1.1]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_js=1.1[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script1.2]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_js=1.2[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script1.3]Tacoda_AMS_DDC_js=1.3[/SCRIPT]  [SCRIPT language=DOH!Script]Tacoda_AMS_DDC("http://te.sfgate.com/tte/blank.gif", Tacoda_AMS_DDC_js)[/SCRIPT] [img]http://te.sfgate.com/tte/blank.gif?0.9029353165047629&snippet_version=1.3&referrer=http%3A//www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi%3Ff%3D/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL&page=http%3A//www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi%3Ffile%3D/c/a/2007/01/18/MNGMMNKOHS1.DTL%26type%3Dprintable&timezone=480&clist_TID=3fg20oa12q3haq&var_site=sfgate&var_section=news%7C%7C&var_psection=article%7Cnews%7C&var_usertype=reader&var_pagetype=article"]

[[A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2006/12/05/BAGAAMPI3D1.DTL"]SAN FRANCISCO Bus riders sniff out shelters New advertisements feature scent of chocolate chip cookies[/A] [/FONT][FONT size=2][/FONT]]

 [HR align=left SIZE=1]  [FONT size=3][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2006/12/05/BAGAAMPI3D1.DTL"]SAN FRANCISCO
Bus riders sniff out shelters
New advertisements feature scent of chocolate chip cookies[/A] [/FONT][FONT size=2][/FONT]
[FONT face=geneva,arial size=1]- [A href="mailto:[email protected]"]Rachel Gordon, Chronicle Staff Writer[/A]
[/FONT][FONT face=geneva,arial size=-2]Tuesday, December 5, 2006
[/FONT] [A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2006/12/05/BAGAAMPI3D1.DTL&o=0&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2006/12/05_t/ba_cookies05_063_rad_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2006/12/05/BAGAAMPI3D1.DTL&o=1&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2006/12/05_t/ba_cookies05_029_rad_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?f=/c/a/2006/12/05/BAGAAMPI3D1.DTL&o=2&type=printable" target=""][img alt="Click to View" hspace=1 src="http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2006/12/05_t/ba_cookies05_045_rad_t.gif" vspace=1 border=0][/A]  Armineh Azizian, a 27-year-old dental hygienist, did something Monday she never did before: She pressed her nose against a bus shelter in downtown San Francisco and took a deep breath.  "I don't smell it,'' she said with an air of disappointment. "I don't smell anything.''  That's because she was upwind. But downwind, the scent she was searching for wafted about -- subtle but distinctive.  "It's very pleasant,'' said photojournalist Morton Beebe, 72, using a phrase not often associated with a San Francisco bus shelter, where the more odoriferous aspects of gritty urban living often linger. "It's not overwhelming.''  The novelty people were talking about Monday was the chocolate chip cookie scent placed in five bus shelters in the city as part of a marketing campaign by the California milk industry to promote its product. The idea is that once people get a whiff of the cookie scent, they'll get a hankering for milk.  The scene Monday around one of the bus shelters, at Stockton and Sutter streets, was a bit like listening to the chatter in a winery tasting room.  "Vanilla-y,'' one woman said as she walked past the shelter.  "Cherry undertones -- and waxy,'' said another woman standing inside.  "These don't smell anything like cookies my mom baked,'' said a teenager.  "It smells like my kid's lunch pail,'' said one man. He walked away before he could say whether that smell was pleasing or offensive.  The campaign has made news -- partly because it's the first of its kind in the nation, and partly because this being San Francisco, there's controversy.  Criticism has come from animal-rights advocates who oppose the dairy industry and from those against promoting food products when there's hunger in the world. But leading the charge against the campaign have been activists in the scent-sensitive community who are upset that public space is being invaded with another aroma that, they fear, can induce headaches and nausea and trigger asthma attacks.  There's an emerging political movement in the United States to snuff out the use of scents in advertising and marketing, but the trend is going the other way. Restaurants, hotels and shops are using fragrance to lure customers and brand products. Magazines have been stuffed with aromatic perfume ads for years.  Blaze Palmer, who works with Azizian in a Sutter Street dental office, said people shouldn't get so uptight about the scented bus shelters. "There are already so many smells in this country. Only in San Francisco would people be offended about the smell of chocolate chip cookies.''  Jeff Goodby, whose advertising firm Goodby, Silverstein & Partners created the "Got Milk?'' slogan 13 years ago, said no one expected everybody to embrace the newest incarnation of the California Milk Processor Board campaign, particularly in a city known for causes.  "Of course we're politically sensitive here,'' said Goodby. "But we also have a sense of humor.''  Louis Zafonte, vice president of Arcade Marketing, the company that manufactures the scent strips that are affixed to the bus shelters, speaks like a mix of preacher, scientist, therapist and businessman when he talks about scent.  "Scent is a primary driver of memory,'' he said. "It can trigger wonderful memories.''  The strips, no larger than a typical adult's hand, have been strategically placed throughout five bus shelters in the Union Square, Financial District and Nob Hill neighborhoods. The aroma is expected to last a week or two before it will have to be replaced. Zafonte said the cost is about $25 per shelter.  Zafonte, who flew in from New York City for Monday's bus shelter campaign kickoff, said people should have no reason to fear any unintended health consequences from the scent, saying it is derived from "very low concentrations'' of the same essential oils found in food products.  "We don't expect it will affect anyone,'' he said.  Joe Broulliette didn't want to take his chances. The 50-year-old night watchman from San Francisco doesn't like the idea of advertisers trying to mess with his mind.  "I'd rather eat chocolate chip cookies than smell them,'' he said, standing outside the bus shelter at Stockton and Sutter.  But Stephanie Jung was enticed by the power of suggestion. The 19-year-old fashion design student convinced her dad to drive her and her 14-year-old sister to the Stockton and Sutter bus shelter just so she could check it out. She described the scent as "crispy.'' And that's just how she likes her cookies: crispy around the edges, chewy in the middle.  "I want to go home and have cookies and a glass of milk,'' Jung said. "It really works.''  E-mail Rachel Gordon at [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A].

  Well the crooks have found a way to rob you of your gift card balance.  If you buy Gift Cards from a display rack that has various store cards you may become a victim of  theft.  Crooks are now jotting down the card numbers in the store and then wait a few days and call to see how much of a balance THEY have on the card.  Once they find the card is "activated", and then they go online and start shopping.  You may want to purchase your card from a customer service person, where they do not have the Gift Cards viewable to the public.

  Read more here...[A href="http://www.snopes.com/fraud/sales/giftcard.asp"]Gift Cards[/A]  

Home is not as safe as you think.  Read the article and watch the video demonstration

  [A href="http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=7on_your_side&id=4747820"]bump key[/A]

[[FONT color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0"]A doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa .[/SPAN][/FONT]]

[SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 18pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 'Arial Black'"]DANGEROUS FOOD[/SPAN]
[FONT color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0"]
A doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa .[/SPAN][/FONT]
[FONT color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0"]
"The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.   Red meat is awful.  Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining.  Chinese food is loaded with MSG.  High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water.  But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it.[/SPAN][/FONT]
[FONT color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0"]
Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[FONT face="Times New R oman" color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0; FONT-FAMILY: 'Times New R oman'"]
After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said,  "[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT color=#800040 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #800040"]Wedding Cake[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT color=#0000a0 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #0000a0"]."[/SPAN][/FONT]

Seattle is one of the cities available in 3-D

  [A href="http://maps.live.com/"]http://maps.live.com/[/A]

[[FONT face=Arial color=blue size=2][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Just enter your name, City and State to see if yours is on file. After your license comes on the screen, click the box marked "Please Remove". This will remove it from public viewing, but not from law enforcement. [/SPAN][/FONT]]

 [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]BLOCK YOUR DRIVER'S LICENSE!

This is upsetting, thought I should pass it along.  Check your drivers license... Now you can see anyone's Driver's License on the Internet, including your own!  I just searched for mine and there it was...picture and all!  Thanks Homeland Security!  Privacy...where is our right to it?

I definitely removed mine, I suggest you all do the same..... Go to the web site and check it out.  [/SPAN]
[FONT face=Arial color=blue size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] [/SPAN][/FONT]
[FONT face=Arial color=blue size=2][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Just enter your name, City and State to see if yours is on file.  After your license comes on the screen, click the box marked "Please Remove".  This will remove it from public viewing, but not from law enforcement. [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=2][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=blue size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=2][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][A href="http://www.license.shorturl.com"]http://www.license.shorturl.com[/A][/SPAN][/FONT][/DIV]

 [P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"][SPAN style="COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]VAN GOGH'S FAMILY TREE

His dizzy aunt---------------------------Verti Gogh

The brother who ate prunes---------------Gotta Gogh

The brother who worked at a convenience store---Stop n Gogh

The grandfather from Yugoslavia ---------U Gogh

The cousin from Illinois --------------Chi-ca Gogh

His magician uncle-----------------Where-diddy Gogh

His Mexican cousin------- --------------A Mee Gogh

The Mexican cousin's American half-brother----Grin Gogh

The nephew who drove a stage coach------Wells-far Gogh

The constipated uncle-------------------- Cant Gogh

The ballroom dancing aunt------------------ Tang Gogh

The bird lover uncle---------------Fla-min Gogh

His nephew psychoanalyst---------------- E Gogh

The fruit loving cousin--------------------Man Gogh

An aunt who taught positive thinking-------- Way-to Gogh

The little bouncy nephew------------------- Poe Gogh

A sister who loved disco----------------- Go Gogh

And his niece who travels the country in a van (you guessed
it!)---Winnie Bay Gogh[/SPAN][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]

[/SPAN][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]And there ya Gogh [/SPAN]

 [DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Who says the police don't have a sense of humor? The following 15 Police[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Comments were taken from actual DallasPolice car videos and distributed by[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Monica Smith, Director DPD Public Relations Officer:[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]15. "Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]       out after you wear them awhile."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]14. "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]        worthless document."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]13.  "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]12.  "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]11.  "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]10. "Yes, sir, by all means you can talk to the shift supervisor if you[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]        think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]9   . "Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you that when you run[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]        that stop sign again, I'll give you another ticket."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]8.   "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]        or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]7.    "Fair?? You want me to be fair?? Listen Pal, fair is a place where you[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]        go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in horsey doo!"[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]6.    "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         oven."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]5.    "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]4.     "Just how big were those two beers?"[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]3.     "In God we trust, all others we run through CPI C/NCIC.."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]2.     "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         And.................... THE BEST ONE !!!!!!![/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]1      "Excuse me ma'am? You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? Well,[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]         you are right, we don't. Now, sign here."[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=2][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][/SPAN][/FONT] [/DIV][XBODY][!-- toctype = X-unknown --][!-- toctype = text --][!-- text --]

Why our country is in trouble.  Perhaps this will explain it all.  

A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

 2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying
to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts,"   Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa,"

Her response - click.

3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."

5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."

 6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

 7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?"  She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!"
After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?"

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which lane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them."

10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?"  I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah,whatever, smarty!"

 11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't.  I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those."  I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"

12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York."  

I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"  

"Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere."
The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is.  Check your map; So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
The reply?  

"Whatever! I knew it was a big animal".



Now you know why Government is in the shape that it's in!

[1,000 rats found in Petaluma home]

[A href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2006/06/22/MNGFDJJ61J16.DTL"]1,000 rats found in Petaluma home[/A] [FONT size=2][/FONT]
[FONT face=geneva,arial size=1]- [A href="mailto:[email protected]"]Cicero A. Estrella and Peter Fimrite, Chronicle Staff Writers[/A]
[/FONT][FONT face=geneva,arial size=-2]Thursday, June 22, 2006
[/FONT]  (06-22) 21:38 PDT -- Petaluma animal control workers expected to find a horde of cats when they knocked on the door of a 67-year-old man whose neighbor complained of stench. Instead, they stumbled onto a scene straight out the movie, "Willard."  About 1,000 pet rats -- ranging from 3-year-old adults to little, pink newborns -- shared the one-room house with Roger Dier.  Dier kept nearly all of his small furry friends in about 20 huge cages that he lined up around the room. About 20 of his rats were running around loose, said Nancee Tavares, Petaluma Animal Services manager.  He also shared the place with seven cats.  "His bed was in the middle of the room, and there was food, cat litter and who knows what else all over the floor," Tavares said.  Whatever else was on the floor wafted into the noses of neighbors, who complained to animal services about what they thought was the smell of cat urine coming from Dier's house.  When Dier opened the door to the Animal Services workers on Tuesday, he told them that he had only seven cats, but added that he did own "a lot of rats," Tavares said.  Animal Services confiscated the rodents Tuesday and spent about $1,000 dollars for cages that are serving as temporary homes at the animal shelter.  Dier was cited for misdemeanor animal cruelty. He kept as many as 50 rats in each of the 30-by-24 inch cages -- crowded conditions, but most of his pets were otherwise well-fed and cared for, Tavares said.  "He made some attempt to segregate the males from the females, but he just became overwhelmed," Tavares said.  Dier also purchased about 250 pounds of rat food every week, she said.  Neighbors described Dier as a quiet man who sometimes worked a computer-related job at night. They said he lived in the home -- one of four in a complex -- on the 800 block of Bodega Avenue for 17 years, and sometimes, they added, he didn't have enough money to pay for electricity.  Dier's landlord, Saverio DiTomaso, said he recently sold the four-house complex because of the headaches that Dier and the rats have caused.  "I could smell the piss from the cats, and then when I saw the rats I went berserk," DiTomaso said. "I didn't want to report him though because I felt sorry for him."  DiTomaso said Dier promised to get rid of the rats. About two weeks ago DiTomaso went against his policy and entered Dier's house. He found that the rats had dug holes through the basement to the yard outside.  "I think it was a dirty trick because I trusted him," DiTomaso said. "I knew there were cats, but rats?"  Neighbor Dave Blake said he killed one of the rats, which strayed too close to his home.  "I can't envision anybody living like that because I hate rats," Blake said.  Animal Services will put the adolescent male rats up for adoption for $5 each starting Tuesday. They will put the females up for adoption in 21 days -- their usual gestation period -- to make sure they aren't pregnant.  About 70 rats were euthanized because they were sick or injured, Tavares said. That leaves the shelter with more than 900 rats.  Tavares doesn't expect many will be adopted. Those that are not adopted will be euthanized, she said.  "They're not that popular," she said. "But they're nice pets, believe it or not. They're very social, they like to ride on their owner's shoulder."  Tavares hopes Dier, whom she described as a "classic hoarder," doesn't face any charges or additional citations.  She hopes he will submit to mandatory monitoring by Animal Services and be allowed to keep no more than two rats.  "Hoarders have a 100 percent rate of recidivism unless some action is taken," she said.  Petaluma animal control workers have experience dealing with hoarders. In 2001, they found 196 cats living inside a Petaluma home owned by a San Francisco resident, Marilyn Barletta.  Anyone interested in adopting a rat can reach Petaluma Animal Services at 707-778-4396.  E-mail the reporters at [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A] and [A href="mailto:[email protected]"][email protected][/A].  
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  Subject: FW: PLEEEEEEASE REEEEEAD! IT WAS ON GOOD MORNING AMERICA TODAY SHOW ..
>
>   THIS TOOK TWO PAGES OF THE TUESDAY USA TODAY - IT IS FOR REAL
>
>To all of my friends, I do not usually forward messages,
>But this is from my friend Pearlas Sandborn and she really is
>an attorney.
>
>If she says that this will work - It will work. After all,What have
>you got to lose?
>
>SORRY EVERYBODY.. JUST HAD TO TAKE THE CHANCE!!! I'm an
>attorney, And I know the law. This thing is for real. Rest assured
>AOL and &nbs p; Intel will follow through with their promises for
>fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one
>filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.
>
>Dear Friends; Please do not take this for a junk letter.
>Bill Gates sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent
>later.
>
>Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies
>and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the
>most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail
>beta test.
>
>When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will
>track it (If you are a Microsoft Windows user) For a two weeks
>time period.
>
>For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay
>you $245.00 For every person that you sent it to that forwards it on,
>Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives
>it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact
>you for your address and then send you a check.
>
>Regards. Charles S Bailey General Manager Field Operations
>1-800-842-2332 Ext. 1085 or 904-1085 or RNX 292-1085
>[mailto:[A href="http://us.f819.mail.yahoo.com/ym/[email protected]" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399] [email protected][/FONT][/A]]Charles_Bailey@[A href="http://csx.com/" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399] csx.com[/FONT][/A]
>
>[mailto:[A href="http://us.f819.mail.yahoo.com/ym/[email protected]" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399] [email protected][/FONT][/A]]p;msg=A44FACE5-D622-41C2-821D-E3A16377D110
>&start=0&len=3 href="mailto:[A href="http://us.f819.mail.yahoo.com/ym/[email protected]" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399] [email protected][/FONT][/A]"
>target=_blank>[A href="http://us.f819.mail.yahoo.com/ym/[email protected]" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399][email protected][/FONT][/A]
>
>thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this
>e-mail and forwarding it on. Microsoft contacted me for my address and
>within days, I received a check for $24,800.00. You need to respond
>before the beta testing is over. If anyone can affoard this, Bill gates is
>the
>man.
>
>It's all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many
>people as possible. You are bound to get at least $10,00000
>We're not going to help them out with their e-mail beta test without
>getting a little something for our time. My brother's girlfriend got in
>on this a few months ago. When i went to visit him for the Baylor/UT
>game. She showed me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and was
>stamped
>"Paid
>in full"
>
>Like i said before, I know the law, and this is for real.
>
>   --------

 [TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 border=0] [TBODY] [TR] [TD style="BACKGROUND-REPEAT: repeat-y" vAlign=top width=16 background=/templates/types/object/graphics/dots_v1.gif rowSpan=3][/TD] [TD vAlign=top align=left width="100%"] [TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0] [TBODY] [TR] [TD vAlign=center align=left]  [/TD] [TD vAlign=bottom align=right][!-- nav begin --][/A] [!-- nav end --][/TD][/TR] [TR] [TD style="BACKGROUND-REPEAT: repeat-x" align=right background=/templates/types/object/graphics/dots_h.gif colSpan=2][/A]   [A title="Click to View" href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=2&f=/c/a/2006/05/29/BAGD7J3V6R1.DTL" target=""][/A]   [A title="Click to View" href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=3&f=/c/a/2006/05/29/BAGD7J3V6R1.DTL" target=""][/A]   [A title="Click to View" href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=4&f=/c/a/2006/05/29/BAGD7J3V6R1.DTL" target=""][/A]   [A title="Click to View" href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=5&f=/c/a/2006/05/29/BAGD7J3V6R1.DTL" target=""][/A]   [A title="Click to View" href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=6&f=/c/a/2006/05/29/BAGD7J3V6R1.DTL" target=""][/A]  

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 [DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]Find the man in the beans! Time Yourself! Wear your [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]glasses.[/SPAN][/FONT][SPAN][FONT size=5] [SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"] [/SPAN][/FONT][/SPAN]

[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]This is bizarre - after you find the guy - it's so[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]obvious. Once you find him - you think, Why didn't I[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]see him immediately?[/SPAN][/FONT][SPAN][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"] [/SPAN][/FONT][/SPAN]

[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
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[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]Doctors have concluded that if you find the man in the[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]coffee beans in 3 seconds, your right half of your[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]brain is better developed than most people. If you[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]find the man between 3 seconds and 1 minute, your[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]right half of the brain is developed normally. If you[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]find the man between 1 minute and 3 minutes, then the[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]right half of your brain is functioning slowly and you[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]need to eat more protein. If you have not found the[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]man after 3 minutes, the advice is to look for more of[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]this type of exercise to make that part of the brain[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]stronger!!![/SPAN][/FONT][SPAN][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"] [/SPAN][/FONT][/SPAN]

[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]And, yes, the man is really there!!![/SPAN][/FONT][SPAN][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"] [/SPAN][/FONT][/SPAN]

[DIV style="MIN-HEIGHT: 14px; MARGIN: 0px"][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"]
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[DIV style="MARGIN: 0px"][SPAN][img]http://us.f819.mail.yahoo.com/ym/us/ShowLetter?box=Inbox&MsgId=5296_7983627_80516_2633_71807_0_1750_98484_1621340926&bodyPart=2&YY=76624&order=down&sort=date&pos=0&view=a&head=b&Idx=0"][/SPAN][FONT size=5][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18px"][/SPAN][/FONT]

=
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[[FONT face="Times New Roman" color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 36pt; COLOR: green"]CHINESE PROVERBS[/SPAN][/FONT]]

 [TABLE style="BACKGROUND: white; WIDTH: 100%" height="100%" cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" bgColor=white border=0] [TBODY] [TR height=250 width="100%"] [TD style="PADDING-RIGHT: 3.75pt; PADDING-LEFT: 4.5pt; PADDING-BOTTOM: 120pt; WIDTH: 100%; PADDING-TOP: 2.25pt" vAlign=top width="100%" height=250] [P style="TEXT-ALIGN: center" align=center][FONT face="Times New Roman" color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 36pt; COLOR: green"]CHINESE PROVERBS[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face="Copperplate Gothic Bold" color=#010101 size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #010101"][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face="Copperplate  Gothic Bold" color=#010101 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: #010101"]

[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who run in front of car get tired.[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face="Arial Narrow" color=#010101 size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: #010101"] [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who run behind car gets exhausted.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][SPAN style="BACKGROUND: white"]
[/SPAN][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man with one chopstick goes hungry.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN] [/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][SPAN style="BACKGROUND: white"]
[/SPAN][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who fight with wife all day gets no piece at night.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][SPAN style="BACKGROUND: white"]
[/SPAN][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4] [SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][SPAN style="BACKGROUND: white"]
[/SPAN][/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* [/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=red size=7][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 36pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*[/SPAN][/FONT][FONT face=Arial color=green size=4][SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 13.5pt; BACKGROUND: white; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]
[/SPAN][/FONT]

[/TD][/TR][/TBODY][/TABLE]

 [DIV class=postcolor id=post-682491]no kidding!

[DIV class=postcolor]

[DIV class=postcolor][A href="http://www.rratch.com/Misc/WaterFuel/WaterFuel.wmv" target=_blank]http://www.rratch.com/Misc/WaterFuel/WaterFuel.wmv[/A][/DIV]

[[A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL"]SAN FRANCISCO / Bay to Breakers race parties with the best / Kenyan wins the event; gloves, Elvis, Noah finish, too[/A]]

 [TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 border=0] [TBODY] [TR] [TD vAlign=top align=left width="100%"]
[FONT face=geneva,arial,sans-serif size=2][A href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL"]SAN FRANCISCO / Bay to Breakers race parties with the best / Kenyan wins the event; gloves, Elvis, Noah finish, too[/A]
As is tradition at the Bay to Breakers, some folks chose not to dress for the occasion. Chronicle photo by Brant Ward [/FONT]

[/TD][/TR] [TR] [TD vAlign=top align=middle width=110][A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=0&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=1&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=2&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=3&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=4&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=5&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=6&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=7&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=10&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=11&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=12&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=13&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=14&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=15&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=16&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=17&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=18&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=19&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    [A title="Click to View" href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/object/article?o=20&f=/c/a/2006/05/22/BAGG9IVV8G1.DTL" target=""][/A]    

[/TD] [TD vAlign=top align=left width="100%"]
[/TD][/TR][/TBODY][/TABLE]    

[Click:]

this guy is good...............[SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Click: [A href="http://gprime.net/video.php/theglasstrick" target=_blank onfiltered="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"][FONT color=#003399]http://gprime.net/video.php/theglasstrick[/FONT][/A][/SPAN]

In the Bay Area ........ we have some of the most honest people

   [DIV id=storysandbox minmax_bound="true"] [P minmax_bound="true"][I minmax_bound="true"](AP)[/I] [I minmax_bound="true"]SAUSALITO[/I] John Suhrhoff found the Louis Vuitton bag on a Sausalito park bench during a lunch stop in the scenic city following a weekend hike.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Inside the bag, police say, was a treasure trove: a 12-carat diamond ring, pearl and emerald jewelry, a Cartier watch and roughly $500 in Canadian and American cash. The contents were worth a cool $1 million.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]But the respiratory therapist didn't think of heading to a pawn shop - he returned the bag to Sausalito police headquarters on Monday afternoon after failing to track down the owners. The bag is en route to the Ghannadian family of Toronto, Canada, who were in Northern California for a daughter's wedding.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]"Every person I know or associate with would have done the same thing," Suhrhoff, 56, of San Rafael, said Tuesday. "I'm glad to be able to help."[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]The Ghannadians told the Marin Independent Journal of Novato that their flight to Toronto was scheduled for Sunday evening, so they decided to visit Sausalito. The town is known for its waterfront views of San Francisco and is a tourist hub.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Shahla Ghannadian briefly left her husband in charge of the purse, which contained jewelry she wore at the wedding, according to the paper.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Suhrhoff said he found the bag on a park bench near a tour bus depot.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Ghannadian started crying when she returned to her San Francisco hotel and realized the bag was gone, the paper said. The family went to Sausalito police headquarters and didn't have any luck - and were told chances were slim the bag would be returned.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]But thanks to Suhrhoff, the bag and its contents are safe.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]"You have to be a real man to return that bag," Ghannadian's son Ali told the Independent Journal. "Even the bag is expensive. We're really, really thankful to that guy."[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]The family did not return calls requesting comment on Tuesday.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Sausalito police Sgt. Kurtis Skoog said it's rare to find someone so honest that they'd pass up a bag of expensive loot. Many others would have tried to pawn the contents off for a fraction of their value, he said.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]Suhrhoff is happy the bag is headed back to Canada but couldn't help wondering why the family was taking such pricey items on day trips to begin with.[BR minmax_bound="true"][BR minmax_bound="true"]"It seems like a lot of expensive jewelry to be carrying around in a purse," he said.[BR minmax_bound="true"]



[P class=storynote minmax_bound="true"](© 2006 The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.)

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