[div class="posttitle"]MI:3 PREMIERE, INTERRUPTED ON SCIENTOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD - May 5, 2006[/div] Contrary to an earlier Hollywood, Interrupted report, the mysterious web presence known as "Project Xenu" did no aerial-advertising at last night's faux MI:3 premiere.
Instead, the evil Lord Xenu made his first red carpet experience in 75 million years:[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
Hail Xenu![/div] Undaunted, the heterosexual Tom Cruise ducked into an abandoned Scientology building...[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
Abandoned Scientology Building[/div] ...from which he emerged with a new Scientologist friend:[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
The heterosexual Cruise's new Scientologist friend[/div] While the heterosexual Tom Cruise's new friend railed against psychiatry for him, the movie star took to the carpet to mingle with his fan:[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
The heterosexual Tom Cruise's fan.[/div] When the heterosexual Tom Cruise and a much taller, much younger chick approached his fan to sign an autograph, a gang of cell phone camera-wielding internet bloggers descended upon him:[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
The heterosexual Cruise, the taller/younger chick and security team greet curious bloggers[/div] [div class="postimg c"]
More cell phone camera bloggers surround the heterosexual Tom Cruise[/div] Put off by the massive cell phone camera blogger presence, the ABC "Action News" Team focuses in...[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
[/div] ...on this blogger's t-shirt:[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
This blogger's immensely popular and newsworthy t-shirt[/div] After the heterosexual Tom Cruise, his friend, that tall chick and his fan ducked into the Mann Chinese Theater for the premiere, Xenu disappeared into the sidewalk.[/p] [div class="postimg c"]
The spot on the sidewalk where Xenu disappeared.[/div]
