[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Who says the police don't have a sense of humor? The following 15 Police[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Comments were taken from actual DallasPolice car videos and distributed by[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]Monica Smith, Director DPD Public Relations Officer:[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"][/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]15. "Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] out after you wear them awhile."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]14. "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] worthless document."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]13. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]12. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]11. "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]10. "Yes, sir, by all means you can talk to the shift supervisor if you[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]9 . "Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you that when you run[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] that stop sign again, I'll give you another ticket."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]8. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]7. "Fair?? You want me to be fair?? Listen Pal, fair is a place where you[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in horsey doo!"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]6. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] oven."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]5. "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]4. "Just how big were those two beers?"[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]3. "In God we trust, all others we run through CPI C/NCIC.."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]2. "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] And.................... THE BEST ONE !!!!!!![/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"]1 "Excuse me ma'am? You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? Well,[/SPAN][/FONT]
[DIV class=MsoNormal][FONT face=Arial size=3][SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"] you are right, we don't. Now, sign here."[/SPAN][/FONT]
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